Player tendencies vs. Character design

Over the last couple of sessions of the campaign I play in (not the one I run), I have come to an interesting conclusion. No matter how a player designs his or her character, if there are certain truths about the player or the way s/he plays, those truths will show up in the character despite its initial design.

For example, say some bloke creates a Wizard character with an Intelligence score of 17, but he himself is as dumb as a rock. No matter how smart the Wizard would be if he were real, he will always act much stupider in-game, since his player doesn't think the way a person of 17 Intelligence would think.

That's relatively easy to understand, and I think widely accepted in the gaming community already. However, I think this kind of thing applies to other aspects of roleplaying characters.

So for a more personal example: I'm a very romantic person. Raised myself on fairy tales and all that jazz. So, the characters I play tend to get into romantic relationships, and often with my girlfriend's characters, since it would be awkward otherwise. I was criticized for this, so I tried to prove a point by playing a character who is very much not a relationship person, and sleeps around. I mean Tanisevania, my current character, Gnomish Druid. This was very difficult for me to do, since she started sleeping with characters played by my friends, but I muddled through it and it was going very well for a while.

Still, certain parts of my romantic tendencies kept popping up. She kept sleeping with one other character more than others, validating it by believing it was necessary for the plot. This character became her best friend since they spent so much time together, and kept growing closer, even though she still slept with whoever she wanted. She even taught this character that if a person wants to be sexually active with many other people, that's fine and a lot of fun, so he behaves that way to a certain extent too.

And then, this character got very angry and stomped off one night to continue the quest without us, and my character got more worried than angry at him, and realized that she had succumbed to my biggest pitfall.

Yes, Tanisevania is in love with Grimsflame. And this is especially ironic considering that he-who-plays-Grim is the one who criticized me in the first place.

So in this example, no matter how hard I try (and I did try as hard as I could and did everything I could think of to prevent it), my characters will end up falling in love with another character. Its less awkward when its my girlfriend's character, since I love her in real life, but even if I try to prevent that, it'll just happen with someone else's character or an NPC. And you know what, the game is less fun for me when I try to fight that tendency. So screw proving any points from here on in.

This actually happened with another of my characters too, one that was already sorta paired up with my girlfriend's character. They were already sleeping together, but it was platonic, until my character, Cyd, had to make a decision regarding my girlfriend's character, Leila. And the only reason she would have made the decision she made was love.

Of course, Cyd reacted much differently to this realization that Tanisevania did. Cyd got angry at herself, but directed that anger at Leila instead, and even when that anger passed she never told her the truth about how she felt. Only when they became Goddesses, and had eternity together, did a) Cyd confess that (if even in words) and b) Leila reciprocate.

Tanisevania's plans are altogether different. She got very upset at first - she has broken many hearts with her sexuality in the past, and thinks that since she did that, she deserves to be rejected now. But thanks to what some of the NPC's said to her, and how my girlfriend's character Kaleena reacted when she found out (how people would normally react to such news), she's decided to risk telling him anyway. She tried already once, and failed, and almost told him again, but decided against it because we were headed into a very important meeting. Grim's kind of....oblivious to certain things, this included, so she has set an intricate plan into motion so that he might understand better when she finally gets the courage to say the words. He used to have two tiny metal goblin heads attached to the two smaller braids on his beard, but they've gotten "lost" throughout the course of the campaign (we do have a Kender rogue, after all). So Tanisevania is getting them remade, and she's bought herself a very nice kimono, since Grim seems to like how she looks in one (picture this, on a fat Gnome woman, in green - http://www.wizards.com/dnd/images/oa_gallery/Bayushi_deceiver.jpg ). She's going to make herself look extra pretty, and dress up in that kimono, then present the new goblin heads to him. Then, if he's willing, she's going to cast Owl's Wisdom on both of them - on herself to fortify her willpower, and on him to up his wisdom and understanding. Then she'll tell him. ...And if it goes badly, she may have to ask the arcane casters if they have any memory modification spells ^^;

Oh, and if anyone cares to see what these characters look like:

Tanisevania and Grim - http://comethime.deviantart.com/art/Educational-Relationship-94595610

Leila and Cyd - http://comethime.deviantart.com/art/Fantasized-73527805