Roleplay-related Rant

Well, sort of a rant. More of a discussion with myself.

Anyway, my girlfriend and I just got back from a session of the DnD game our friend Heather runs and we play in, along with other friends of ours. She's playing a Kender rogue, and I'm playing my Gnome druid. As a Kender, her character is very outspoken and chatty and active and such, and she does an amazing job playing her.

My character, who's named Tanisevania and has been mentioned already here in great detail, is very different both from my girlfriend's character and any other character I've ever played. She's kinda passive, and not as outspoken as she could be. She's also a pacifist, so she hates being engaged in battle or having to deal with fighting. This can lead to situations where she is.... well, not as active in roleplay as others. We also play with a very chaotic group of people, and I'm VERY passive, so sometimes its hard for me to get a word in.

Anyway, when we came home tonight, we talked about the amount of additional roleplay-based experience we got from the DM. We either got the same amount or she got less, I'm not sure. Her character did quite a bit this session - I think we all did, and played our characters well. Because of all the chaos, however, some of what she did probably was lost to the DM (she sits at the other end of the table from her), so she probably didn't get XP for all of it. When discussing this, she said that she did more than I did, so she should have gotten more XP than me.

That is technically true, but it has lead me to interesting thoughts. In tonight's session, I played my character as best I could. She was quieter than most in many situations because that's more her nature. She's not as outspoken as most of the other characters. So, how much of that is roleplay accurate, and should I be missing out on XP because of it?

Most of the roleplay I've done thus far while playing her has been in one-on-one situations with other characters or in very small groups. She's only had to interact with large numbers of people a few times, and in all those situations, I have kinda clammed up.

The first was a bar brawl, only in a fancy restaurant, so she hid under a table for the extent of it. The brawl actually formed out of a party, and while that was going on, I did do some roleplay via secret paper to Wayne, who is playing the character my character is currently sleeping with. But when the fight began, she just did that, and I didn't do much of anything.

The second was a royal ball, for which some of us got to go to the palace. Before it started, when she was mingling with only a few other people, I was better at playing her. But when the ball started, I just sat back and let the assumption go that she was dancing with anyone who asked her and making small talk. Again, I didn't do much of anything.

Then tonight, we ended up finally with the whole party in one place. There's six of us, plus 3 NPC's now, so that's a considerable group too. I was better at getting her to interact with people than the previous two examples, but I can still see what my girlfriend meant. There was a lot more that I could have done. There's a woman in our party, a human cleric named Conalla, who is a total stranger to all of us. My character would have talked to her more to try and figure out what kind of person she was. The small quest we're on now is also taking her away from her main goal, and I hinted at her discomfort and distractedness a bit, but I could have played it out more. We're travelling now too, on a road through the forest, so she's MUCH more comfortable now than she has been at any point since we started playing. I blatantly stated this, but I could have made it obvious with examples instead. Like maybe she should have been humming, and have a more relaxed posture, and looking around happily. Stuff like that. But I didn't. She also didn't really do any roleplay with Grim (Wayne's character) to explain why they couldn't have sex while they were camping with the whole party, and now that I think about it, that would have been crucial. Crap.

Okay, my girlfriend was entirely right. I kinda sucked at the roleplay thing tonight. I am not entirely blaming myself though. I have difficulty getting a word in when everyone else is chattering around me, so that made it difficult. But I should have tried harder. Yes, based on past roleplay, Tanisevania seems uncomfortable in huge crowds. But that's no excuse for her to not interact with the party.

I will try harder next week. Ugh, I feel like an ass.